Posts

Circles from 2016

Unpublished post from way back in 2016, which seems so very long ago..... Here goes...the unedited, original post:  Car rides, no matter how short, seem to be where my children and I have the most thought provoking conversations. Yesterday Chestnut (aka. Sophie) was observing all of the changes in 2016. In her words, if someone had shown us the year ahead on New Year's Eve, there's no way we would have believed what the coming months were to bring upon us.... 2016 has been a year of tremendous change for our little Chesley family....we've been on a roller coaster of medical crisis, loss, confusion, good-byes, setting boundaries, new beginnings, fear wrangling, mindfulness, and rebirth. I won't go into details on many events but I can share that in February John and I separated and we've been living apart since. Let me just say, we are all ok. Truly. The Chesley's are on the road of positive growth and rebirth. Literally picking ourselves up by our bootstraps

A Thousand Mornings and Ben Franklin

"What is this schedule thing under the glass on the desk?" he asked. "Oh, that is just Ben Franklin's daily schedule that I printed." I responded. He looked at me as if I had three heads and didn't ask any more questions, probably not wanting to engage in another crazy Amanda "idea" A few weeks ago I came across an article on time management that referenced Ben Franklin's daily schedule. Since I am always seeking ways to improve my time management, I was fascinated at how good ol' Ben organized his day, allotting time for personal reflection, social affairs, reading, and of course work. I find that more often than not the day can get away from me leaving no time for personal reflection, self improvement, etc. Work and my "social" time (i.e. Social Media) consumes my day. SO....I decided to take on the challenge of working a modern version of Ben Franklin's schedule.Of course, I am not the first to have this fascination...thi

Wine @ 9:30!

We all have those days, where you just start off on the wrong foot, where you are the bug not the windshield. Yesterday, I started out as the bug. My day began awaking startled as I discovered it was 7:09, Sophie's bus comes @ 7:15....and my schedule was jam packed until 9:30PM when I would shuffle Jill home from Basketball. John was off to NYC and suddenly I was faced with the chaos it all, alone. All day I was counting the hours to 9:30, when I would finally arrive at home and could pour a glass of wine and unwind...all day, 9:30 was my time, my mantra, just get to 9:30. At 9:00, I went back to watch the last 15 minutes of Jill's practice and was smacked with a dose of "get your priorities in order" reality. The human spirit and this girl never ceases to amaze me. She has NEVER played BBall and was quite nervous for her first practice, as you can imagine. But there she was, out there, owning that ball, running the court, smiling, and RUNNING!!! I can't explain

Early Detection

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The Affordable Health Care act– guarantees out-of-pocket costs will be eliminated in new insurance plans for proven preventive services, giving people access to lifesaving screenings for breast, cervical, and colorectal cancer.  How can you argue with this??? People who can't afford mammograms don't get them, if they find the cancer too late, the cost of their care is beyond fathomable - and guess what??? They can't pay for that care and the taxpayers will, after years of account receivable, lawyers, tax write offs, etc... The Affordable Health Care act is a law, one that was upheld by the Supreme Court...what is there to argue about to the point of shutting down our government?  I am beyond dismayed at our leaders who are clearly acting in the best interest of themselves, their business constituents, and  big insurance companies. It is very sad :( As for me, my life was saved thanks to early detection. 36, stage 1, triple negative and now cancer free for three years. I am

Not So Fast Sparky: Take 2

I seem to only come to this blog when the heavy stuff is weighing on me...so here I am again. For months I have been ignoring the calls and letters of the insurance company that has the claim for the accident Jill was in last summer. In the beginning, I didn't want to deal with anything except her and her recovery. The rest could wait. Then, after her complete recovery from the last surgery, we had a little post traumatic stress to deal with, and then I just wanted a nice quiet, easy summer. Finally, I face the music, thinking I am ready to talk to insurance companies and tell the story to start the closing process. The woman at the insurance company is nice enough, but she needed to know the extent of injuries, impact on social, sports, grades, etc. As I went through the story for what feels like the millionth time, I found myself reliving not only the tale, but the emotion of it. Man, this was a hard year. It hs so hard to fathom what we as humans go through and the amazing str

Words for Thought

Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice: And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you. (Ephesians 4:31, 32 KJV) This is something I still need improvement on. While I am so much better than I was before, I still catch myself in moments of weakness where my tongue lashes out and is harsh, even when my feelings aren't harsh.  For today, I will pray and be aware, letting bitterness, wrath, anger, clamour, and evil speaking be out away....out of sight and action.  I feel that I am tender hearted and kind, but focus needs to be put on my words aligning them with my actions.,,,today will be a great day.  Be kind to one another in thought, words, and actions! Interesting music discovery: Lorrie McKenna - Monday Afternoon This song came on during my devo time with the above verse...a juxtaposition for sure...but befitting considering today is a

What it's like

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...it all turned out to be ok...but these are thoughts written during a recent scare....life is good. So...bad news is that I feel a lump...again, and in the same place I felt it three years ago. Good news is, I am getting an ultrasound on my boob, thanks to my rockin' oncologist who is very cautious and listens. To be honest, I felt this lump a while ago, and doc gave me the ultrasound order in November. I am kicking myself for waiting so long, for letting fear once again take hold and cause paralysis. I hope that God's grace is on my side today and this is just nothing but scar tissue. Shout out to you God, I have faith in my destiny and your purpose, but please don't let that be cancer vs. Amanda, round two. I am sitting in the little closet room in Washington Radiology waiting for my turn at the ultra sound machine, they are running behind, it is 45 min past my appt time and there are still two ahead of me. So much for this being a quick part of my day, no stress, in