FT2LIV

I decided long before I had kids, that I would always be very open, honest, and candid with them. Taking a no holds barred approached has fared well, I think. My kids are very bold, outgoing, and are not afraid to speak their minds. Yes, this had it's downsides, but raising quiet, "yes" people is just not me. With that said, I also have a pretty open house. The kids are free to go through whatever drawer, closet, bag they want to, I have nothing to hide (that they can find). Well, that was before I realized I now have Grandma's Scary closet. You know what I mean...do you remember the first time you "discovered" grandma's dentures...or her weird pointy bra's in her closet?GROSS!!! Those kinds of discoveries make Friday the 13 th look like Nick Jr. Seriously. They scar you for life. Since I am now a Breast Cancer lady...I have some pretty weird stuff... Stryo heads with wigs...scarfs galore...and yes, prosthetic boobs. I know, TMI ...but this is wha...

How is it possible to sleep for 36 hours? I never quite understood the fatigue and chemo- therapy , let me tell you, it is not a choice. Your body just takes over and whether you like it or not, want to or not, you are down. You just sleep. Last week, before the last treatment, I asked the Dr. what I could do to fight the fatigue. I really can't stand being "down" for so long - life is whirling by and I am sleeping!!! He chuckled and said, I could try exercise but I would be lucky if I could get a 10 minute walk in on the tough days. This is just what is does to you. I am not complaining...I am grateful for the medicine that takes aways many of the side effects and eases others. I suppose sleep is what the body needs to come back from being stripped down. I decided that for my next and LAST (YEAH!!!) round of chemo, I am going to try to blog each day...what it feels like. You don't have to read it... lol . While I will be ready to move on and celebrate life, I don...

To start, I am not even sure what to title this post; I don't even know how to describe how I am feeling...I guess that is why I wanted to blog. Let's begin with the hair loss...which I was OK with, sort of, up until life presented itself. The thing about losing your hair is that suddenly you are out there. No longer can I hide behind my fake boobs and smile, now it is out there for everyone to see...the woman with no hair; which means she is one of them..one of those cancer people. In the beginning, I handled this with as much bravery as I could, even going out bald, and OK with it. Then two things happened. First, I am faced with some work activity which requires me to be out there in a meeting and on camera...and being bald or in a scarf I just can't do. The second, is Breast Cancer Awareness month. Work...well, I can deal with it, I even threw myself into it. However, I had to go get one of those things...a WIG... arg to prepare for the meetings. I hate the one that ...

What a nice day we had at Pumpkin ville in Leesburg. I figured that even with low immunity, I would be relatively safe hanging outside with the fam at the Pumpkin Patch. So, after everyone returned from Church (I stayed home for that part) - Nana, Sophia, Dottie, and I took off for the Pumpkin Patch. Festivals are not really Jillian's favorite past time, so she chose to hand out with Dad and Pop for some Football and handyman work. :) We sure missed her though! Here is a fun little Smile box we made about our day. The weather was perfect, the apple cider was tasty, and the zip lines were fast! Yeah! Another scrapbook design by Smilebox

Just a quick note....I succumbed to the hair falling out and went to the barber and had it shaved last Wednesday. Take note that we live in a new neighborhood (since June) and while some have been friendly, you know...we are still the newbies. So out I go in my pink scarf to walk the dog, and you would have thought I was a celebrity...people waving, smiling, saying hi. It was pretty funny. I guess scarves bring out the kindness of strangers, works for me. However, this is another life lesson...why wait for the scarf to wave? Just do it. When I walk, I will make sure to smile, wave, and say hi. Although, you know I pretty much did this all along. Good Night. ;)