FT2LIV

Spring is one of my favorite seasons. I love the newness of it, the fresh grass, flower buds, even checking what weeds are trying to make their way into my garden. I always have visions of all that I will do through the next few seasons while the weather is warm and I can be outdoors mulling about. The newness of Spring has me shopping - not just any shopping, shopping for my next adventure. Soon, I will begin to re-build Amanda. The past year has been about stripping me down, cleaning out the bad stuff, and kicking cancer's ever loving ass. Now, I am rebuilding - reconstructing. I have interviewed several doctors and it is really hard to decide which one to choose. We are so blessed to live in this age of medicine and choice! I am so blessed not to have a medical plan that limits my choices...but with lots of choice comes tough decisions. I think I have made up my mind, I have surgery scheduled on May 25 and I pray that I am making the right decision. Only time will tell and my fa...

I should have listened to my intuition this morning that told me just to stay in bed a little longer...but then again, it tells me that every day. My routine of drinking greens, juicing vegetables, taking new vitamins, and working out at least 4-5 times a week has really got me going. I feel great and I am ready to tell the world about the amazing benefits of these things (ok...so some of you have had to hear me rant about this already....sorry). Off to work I went, only to be slapped down by some events that really triggered the not so happy side of me...I decided that all involved would be best served if I detached and took a little walk. On my walk I discovered the Blood Drive...why not I asked? I should be ok, right? I am months off of treatment, I am a pillar of health (insert laugh here)...there is no reason not to give and give back. hmmm...not so fast bucky. I read through the list of in-eligible donors, my "condition" was not on there...so to the booth I went. At thi...

I recall when my kids were little, after their baths, they would sing out "ALL CLEAN"!!! I am not sure when we started this, but that is what rang in my head when I hung up the phone after chatting with Dr. Darling, my Oncologist. Yes, we are ALL CLEAN with a check-up in three months and another round of CT Scans in 6 months. Today is a day to celebrate life and live it with all we've got. I have been running - today I ran a little over two miles, the word on the street is that when you can run three miles, you have "arrived" as a runner. So, today I strive to add "runner" to my list of me which will bring me a little closer to that goal of completing a Sprint Tri . For those of you who know me, you know that I am super graceful and that watching me run is like watching the Washington Ballet (kidding)...so keep an eye out for the clumsy one running in Leesburg , I just might trip over your car.

Time flies...I can't believe how much has happened in three months and that I haven't blogged about it. Since my last post, I have returned to work full time, returned to school, entered back into the world of full time worker and mom trying to balance the activities of every day life, all while looking for new ways to live a healthy lifestyle. But first...let me tell you that I did have my three month CT scan two weeks ago. There is a life lesson in here...somewhere. Apparently, it is a good idea to have your scans at the same facility, which I did not. I had my August scans at Fairfax Radiology and my March scan at Washington Radiology. When I walked in to get my scan a couple of weeks ago...my bad karma flag was flying high. The nurse was the same nurse who was there for the Mammo hell and the very woman who told me "not to jump" when it was determined that I needed a biopsy. Back then..she told me that I would be fine and that most biopsies turn out to be false a...

For some reason I have been procrastinating sitting down and writing. I have been thinking a lot about what I will share and put down on paper, but I just haven't been able to do it. This time between the last chemo and now has been so bittersweet. I am very happy that chemo is over and to leave behind most of the effects. To think that I will only continue to gain strength and clarity is overwhelming; for this I am incredibly grateful. But...I am also scared. Here's the deal, because I am triple negative, I can't take any of the hormones to keep the cancer away. In fact, there is nothing I can take, I have to really walk in my faith and trust God. Sure, I will modify my diet, exercise more, stress less, and follow any road that may guarantee that I will be a survivor for many, many more years. But I feel empty, alone, and scared. Perhaps, this is why I have prolonged the writing; I wasn't ready to admit that. Today, in less than two hours, I will have my medi -port rem...

Well, day two has passed and I am almost done with day three....of the 21 day recovery process from treatment. Yesterday was pretty good, with the only side effects of a longer than usual nap :) and hot flashes. Those are really fun...I think I changed pajamas three times in the night and woke up feeling like I had been jogging through the desert in the middle of summer. I also woke up with the sunburn to go with it. My entire body looked as if I had been sitting in the desert with no sunscreen for hours... LOL . Luckily I did not feel like I had a sunburn, only looked it. Thank goodness it wears off when I get up and move around, it must be something with laying down..who knows. If my memory serves me right, this will last a few days. Today was OK, in the morning I felt ok , just a bit tired, but I was able to get to church and grab the much needed Sunday Starbucks. The side effect of losing my sweet tooth is setting in - this is very odd for me, because I LOVE sweets and during this ...

Today, November 12 2010, marks the beginning of the end of Chemotherapy!!! I promised myself that I would blog/journal each day of this last round, so as not to forget all of the good and bad times that come along with this treatment. This week I felt great! I had little fatigue, no nausea, no side effects, I was pretty much back to normal. I tried to fill each day with a bit of normalcy and as much fun as possible. It started on Monday with an incredible hike in great falls with my dear friend Deb. We brought the dogs, the views were gorgeous and we encountered a hidden forest of bluebirds and woodpeckers - this is a day that will fuel me when I am feeling bad next week...I will be able to look back and know that I will soon be back on my feet experiencing life - it is EXACTLY what I needed..time with part of my soul (Deb) and a hike to feed my soul. I also got out a little more for work and had a face to face meeting which felt great! I am so ready to be back out there, doing my thin...