Circles from 2016
Unpublished post from way back in 2016, which seems so very long ago.....
Here goes...the unedited, original post:
Car rides, no matter how short, seem to be where my children and I have the most thought provoking conversations. Yesterday Chestnut (aka. Sophie) was observing all of the changes in 2016. In her words, if someone had shown us the year ahead on New Year's Eve, there's no way we would have believed what the coming months were to bring upon us....
2016 has been a year of tremendous change for our little Chesley family....we've been on a roller coaster of medical crisis, loss, confusion, good-byes, setting boundaries, new beginnings, fear wrangling, mindfulness, and rebirth. I won't go into details on many events but I can share that in February John and I separated and we've been living apart since.
Let me just say, we are all ok. Truly. The Chesley's are on the road of positive growth and rebirth. Literally picking ourselves up by our bootstraps and living our lives out loud.
Many that I trusted have turned their backs or used me for gossip, but those that count remain steadfast have held me up when I needed it the most. Divorce brings about many painful elements, the loss of friends and family is unexpected and compounds the pain, at least temporarily. Being a divorcee still has an unspoken stigma, despite the fact that we are in 2016. Go figure. Just another boot strap people, I've moved on.
Answers to some things you may be wondering:
The kids are fine.
They know we both love them and that our love, co-parenting, and support of them remains unwavering despite the circumstances.
The fact is that we just weren't providing the best environment for our children any more, our relationship got to a point where we are much better apart than we are together. Cliche? Yes. However staying together "for the sake of the children" was causing them more harm than good. Only we need to know the details, but trust me on this one.
John and I are fine.
I can only speak for myself, but I will always love and respect John, especially as the father of my children, I expect that we will always be friends. We had a very successful marriage, bringing three amazing souls into this world. It doesn't get much better than that.
We are friends, we are amicable, and this divorce is not and will not be nasty. We refuse to let it go there.
There are more changes coming, but we Chesley's can handle it, we are a united front, no matter what. The circle of family does not break in a divorce, it just changes shape, we still hold each other in love, trust, and support - just in a different way, one that is healthy. Love wins, even in divorce.
2016 has been a year of tremendous change for our little Chesley family....we've been on a roller coaster of medical crisis, loss, confusion, good-byes, setting boundaries, new beginnings, fear wrangling, mindfulness, and rebirth. I won't go into details on many events but I can share that in February John and I separated and we've been living apart since.
Let me just say, we are all ok. Truly. The Chesley's are on the road of positive growth and rebirth. Literally picking ourselves up by our bootstraps and living our lives out loud.
Many that I trusted have turned their backs or used me for gossip, but those that count remain steadfast have held me up when I needed it the most. Divorce brings about many painful elements, the loss of friends and family is unexpected and compounds the pain, at least temporarily. Being a divorcee still has an unspoken stigma, despite the fact that we are in 2016. Go figure. Just another boot strap people, I've moved on.
Answers to some things you may be wondering:
The kids are fine.
They know we both love them and that our love, co-parenting, and support of them remains unwavering despite the circumstances.
The fact is that we just weren't providing the best environment for our children any more, our relationship got to a point where we are much better apart than we are together. Cliche? Yes. However staying together "for the sake of the children" was causing them more harm than good. Only we need to know the details, but trust me on this one.
John and I are fine.
I can only speak for myself, but I will always love and respect John, especially as the father of my children, I expect that we will always be friends. We had a very successful marriage, bringing three amazing souls into this world. It doesn't get much better than that.
We are friends, we are amicable, and this divorce is not and will not be nasty. We refuse to let it go there.
There are more changes coming, but we Chesley's can handle it, we are a united front, no matter what. The circle of family does not break in a divorce, it just changes shape, we still hold each other in love, trust, and support - just in a different way, one that is healthy. Love wins, even in divorce.
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