Let's go Four Wheelin'

Many of you know what I am about to share already, so this will be a repeat, proceed at your own risk of boredom.

For the past 37 years I have worked on building my life as a mother, employee, wife, daughter, friend, slave to my dog, and more. On June 2, my world was turned upside down as I received the news that my breast biopsy was positive for cancerous cells.

Back-up about three weeks and you will find me at the OB for my routine yearly exam, he handed me a prescription for a Mammogram, and told me that if I felt like it, I could go, now that I am 36...I thanked him and went on my way. About a week later, I found a lump and decided to cash in that Mammogram ticket. I was informed that because I found a lump, I would need a new order for a Digital Mammogram with diagnostics. So, back to the doc I went. Upon examining the lump, he informed me that he felt it was a Fibroadenoma and I had nothing to worry about, but I should check it out anyway. The rest is history and quite a blur...I went for the Mammogram, was immediately taken to the next room for an ultra-sound and informed that I needed a biopsy of the mass...To me, it looked like a dark hole in the mist of all the other tissue around it...to them it was cause for furrowed eye-brows.

I went back about a week later for the biopsy..which hurt..bad. Little did I know it was just the beginning for a world of hurt. The Doctor and Nurse explained that the mass seemed to be non-cancerous, and I shouldn't worry. That next day, I went along with Jillian's Girl Scout troop camping, confident that I had nothing to worry about and perturbed that I couldn't swim or lift any heavy objects.

Several days later, I got the call...the call that would change my life..forever.

"Mrs. Chesley, it's Dr. Bad News, from Washington Radiology, do you have a moment? Is now a good time?"

"Yes, how are you?"

"Mrs. Chesley, we have the results from your biopsy, and I am sorry to say that the mass is malignant. Honestly, this is quite a shock to all of us."

"Are you kidding? You must be kidding?"

"No, Mrs. Chesley, I am sorry, I am not joking"

She goes on to tell me about the tumor size, the Stage, who I need to call, what I need to do...thank god I had the sense to write it all down...because I was literally standing beside myself. After that, I do what any self respecting mother does when there is an end-of school party at the school, I walk over to deliver my baked goodies. Only, I couldn't even look anyone in the eye, I was devastated. I see my friend, who I had confided in over the weekend, and I just lose it. She gives me a warm hug and I literally run out of the school before I cause a scene.

Next...I call my husband..how do you share this news? How do you rock the world of the people you love? I will expand on this more, later, but let me say, he is one hell of a guy and I am one lucky lady.

Ok..fast forward a few weeks, I have told work, my parents, my kids...my decision is to have a bi-lateral mastectomy with reconstruction. A dear, sweet soul friend of mine, who is also a photographer took the family photo above and many more the evening before my surgery...a photo shoot and set of pictures that I will cherish forever. These pictures capture life and my family before I began my transformation.

So, I executed the plan, in part, on July 23, 2010. The in-part is that I decided to only have the bi-lateral mastectomy for now, I will explain why later...it is a long chapter. ;) My pathology report is Stage 1C, Invasive Ductal Carcinoma, 1.5gross, Grade 3, Triple Negative, with .1cm margin. No nodes impacted and they feel that they were able to remove the cancer with the surgery. However, because this is an aggressive cancer, grade 3 (not stage 3...stage 1), and invasive, I will begin Chemo-therapy soon..once they install a port in my chest to make the administering of chemo "easier". This is where the four-wheelin comes in - I will begin 12 weeks of "TC" Chemo soon - a road not quite as traveled as some other chemo-cocktails, but this should be easier on my heart, harder on my body in the short term, and a good butt-whipping. So, for those of you who always wanted to kick me in the backside, I am doing it for you. :)

I will expand more later, today, I just feel blessed, I have wonderful friends and family, an amazing husband, super fantabulous kids, a dog that lets me cry with her...even at 2:00AM, and the best boss/team a girl could ask for. If this had to happen to me, now is the time. Rest assured, I will be ok, in fact, I will be better than ok, I will walk away from this a better wife, mom, daughter, friend, cousin, niece, employee, than ever. I love you all and thank you for being there for me. You keep me going and along with God, give me the strength I need to keep smiling and dancing, every day.

If you are a woman, go get your Mammogram, squeeze those ta-ta's in that horrible vice and remember it could save your life. ;)

Until next time...for now, I am off to watch a movie with my awesome girls.